Saturday, June 24, 2006

The Life of A Slum Lord; Part I

When we started this project we had big dreams. $$ were floating around our delusional heads. We were going to flip these places like flap-jacks on a griddle. Thus far; we have managed to acquire three new investment properties in addition to previously owned ones. We are not flipping anything in from a griddle - more like jumping with both feet & a squeal into the boiling pot of slumlordism. Due to capital gains taxes each property must be held for 3 years....ok, we said we'd rent to differ the cost. House #1 was great.... all done except for some minor crap. Example a:

We felt so successful at this that we immediately turned this into a second equity line for our "big" project house. A duplex in 'CENTRAL' south St. Pete. ummm... If you thought this last place was in a sketchy neighborhood, you ought to take a little drive through our duplex hood!!
Exhibit b:

note the boards on the windows & bars on others. This is not storm prevention. Whilest reflooring the back closet, the second story fell into the the first. Mixed in the debris from the floor of upstairs & the ceiling of the ground floor laundry room was a Pyrex pot, lighters, razor blades, a smallish pipe, baking soda & lip balm. Humm.... We then had the name for exhibit b:

'The Crack Shack'

Slum Lord; Part II

a continuation of the previous blog:

As if this all weren't enough: the property next door went to foreclosing auction & guess who just had to have it? Yup, we're suckers!! Exhibit c:

This little treasure was so much more than we could have ever expected. Silly me asked the auctioneer for a key after we bought it for far more than the home we live in. Yeah Right...the land sharks got a good laugh. We had to break into it through that ground floor window. Here's what we found. Exhibit Xd:

Incase the visual is unclear: we are pretty sure this is the remains of a large/midsized dog. It is allbut decomposed into the carpet but the skeletal remains are very clearly canine.

I think we'll save exhibits c & Xd for our visiting relatives who just love to help us with our little home improvement projects for FREE. Anybody got an extra Hazardous Materials Suit handy?