To Kill A Rat
I've laid my traps. A feast fit for royalty has been prepared. Come my pretties, come. As dusk approaches I watch the amber hue of the street lights glow. Soon, I'll open my bottle of red, taking my glass & my place to watch the festivities. Let the rat bastards come tonight. Let their dainty little feet tiptoe across my wooden rails with the agility of a tight rope artist. I relish the thought of no weapons. The greed of mine enemy will consume him. Come my pretties come, your table awaits.
13 Comments:
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i deleted my previous comment cause i said something super blonde. here we go again:
this is too freakin' funny. the picture adds just the right touch. i wish you the best of luck catching many many offenders.
i think maybe my original comment was more fun. dang-it.
How friggin' big is this rat!!! Looks like a bear trap...LOL!
Good Luck to ya...and how many BBQ's will you get outta this one?
Chalk ONE up to the 'slayer'. I refrained from the digital image as my blogs already contain deceased animals & God forbid PETA gets involved in my life. I am the master of the rat trap.
Come on you big pussy....put the picture on...we all love a little gore!!!
Ok so you're not a pussy...you're a rebel rockstar and I'm jealous, so have a drink for me!
Come on you big pussy....put the picture on...we all love a little gore!!!
Ok so you're not a pussy...you're a rebel rockstar and I'm jealous, so have a drink for me!
Why that posted twice, I don't know...so sorry!
PETA called...they want their dog and rat remains back.
I am again victorious!! Two down & a trillion or more to go. PETA can kiss my Big Fat Ass, not the right or left cheek but right down the middle. The only ethical thing to do with rats OR spiders is to squish them. F%$#@*^ the Hippies!!! (censored for the sake of my mother in law who may or may not be reading this.)
the dog fud bait isn't doing the trick. by now I should be up to 5or 6. I'm reverting back to my old tried & true method - peanutbutter. I'll keep a running record of my success.
rats don't like cheese? what kind of ratbastards are they? maybe they'd like some chum? heather H & I went into the house that C.B. and Justin O. were living in (daytona) and it had been closed up for a long time, they had basically abandoned it, but asked us to go in to retrieve something...and omg..the cockroaches. they were everywhere. and the biggest scariest suckers i've ever seen. i'm sooooo glad i never encountered a rat down there. or any other scary creature for that matter. cuz i do scream like a girl.
this morning's rat was definately preggo!! Yeah, I think that counts for like 5 at once. Peanut Butter... gets em everytime!!!! call me the slayer.
Got another one.... what's that like 8 in a week... I rock.
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